Thomas James Clarke, Jr.

May 22,1968- November 10,2007.

Thank you for all of your support, thoughts and prayers.

October 18,2007

Hello,

We would like to thank so many of you for all of your wonderful emails filled with thoughts and prayers. Many of you have asked for updates.

Tom is still fighting, with everything else working against him, his 39 year old heart keeps him here with us. Our Dr. has been there every step of the way trying to keep him comfortable however as she said there is only so much we can do.

I do read any email correspondence to him, so please feel free to email any messages.

Thanks
Melissa

UPDATE ON TOM

Hello Everyone,

This is to update you on Tom's condition. On Sept. 22 he was re-admitted into hospice. He currently sleeping most of the days, he has lost use of his legs due to disease progression into the bones which we found out a couple of weeks ago. Plus various other issues. Our Dr. has told us we have days, however Tom's age and his heart are keeping him here with us so we really don't know.

The times when Tom is awake, vary from inability to communicate to a classic Tom Clarke comments/joke.

We appreciate everyone's thoughts and prayers.

Thank you,
Melissa

Not Dying Fast Enough

Well, I went to the doctor I said, "I'm feeling kind of rough"
He said, "Let me break it to you, son",
Your shit's fucked up."
I said, "my shit's fucked up?" Well, I don't see how--"
He said, "The shit that used to work-- It won't work now."

That amazing Grace sort of passed you by.
Then you wake up Every day you and hang your head and cry.
Yeah, you wanna die , But you just can't quit
Let me break it on down,
That's some fucked up shit.

--Warren Zevon, My Shit's Fucked Up, Life'll Kill Ya, (1999)

Speaking seriously, that's what happened. Didn't die, wasn't deteriorating fast enough. If you die or seriously deteriorate within 60 days you're out. They of course didn't of spring these rules on us until about Day 56. "Look at the the time; time for you to go" as my 7 year old says.

So, I'm back at home, having a 1st floor shower installed at considerable expense which would be even more if contractor friends of ours weren't doing the labor gratis. So back and forth between home and mom and Dad's place to try to get some sleep. Now I'm using the cane quite a bit more and sleeping more. More painkillers . A total of 55 pills a day now. Still, it's a hell a better being at home than hanging out with a bunch of 85 year olds. 19 of them "passed on" while I was there. So my shit's fucked up: Just not fucked up enough for hospice.

The Worst People In the World 2007

"The Lone Ranger fought for law and order in the early west. I killed morons. Still do."

The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid, A Memoir, Bill Bryson, page 63, (2006).

"Sue the Bastards!"

Victor J. Yannacone, Jr., Speech, East Lansing, Michigan, April 22 1970

Like Sallie Mae. And their ilk. (P.S. ---Don't you love that phrase? and their ilk?)

Student lenders are and their collectors have to be some of the lowest forms of life out there. Somewhere slightly ahead of amoebas, but definitely behind ants.

I have a loan with Sallie Mae, and have faithfully made payments for over ten years. I recently reread the the contract, and discovered that because I was disabled, my loans were to be forgiven, ad I no longer had to make payments. All I had to was send in the the paperwork, and voila! No more student loans. (They have to discharge the loans upon death of the the lendee, anyway).

So in February, shortly after being given my Last of my x months to live forecasts, I started going through my financial affairs and discovered the dischargeability of the the student loans. My oncologist quickly (within a week filled ) out the other paperwork, and I waited (The sixty days) which they are allowed to make a decision, meanwhile not making payments because I was not required to. (Now, I understand that they get to make their own independent evaluation of my condition, But when your oncologists are calling it quits, what do think the answer is going to be?) 120 days later, I started getting telephone calls demanding payment . When I explained that discharge was under consideration the person on the other end of the phone told me that decision had been made and been denied. When I inquired as to when this decision had been made, and on what basis) I couldn't get a straight answer.

Of course, you can never get an answer as to whom you are speaking to, they say tell them you spoke Bob1178K4". Yeah that's gonna get me real far when I'm trying to straighten out my credit rating or my wife's. Even the "Supervisors" don't have real names. I just tell them I can't speak to people who don't have last names , addresses or direct dial telephone numbers. When I did finally receive the letter, the claim made by Sallie Mae was that someone other than my doctor had filled out the form. I did check with my oncologist and he was pissed. He confirmed that he had filled out the form. I wrote the legal department around June 15 and indicated that if they didn't figure it out I (Or my estate would) sue if this matter was not immediately cleared up. Of course, I have not a word from them since sending the letter.

If you or your loved one (whether or not the loan was with Sallie Mae) is interested is in possibly suing these goons for breach of contract, fraud, etc. please leave a comment with an e-mail where I can get a hold of you.

Innummeracy

The term "innumeracy" is one I first came about in a mathematical book by Douglas Hofstatder about twenty five years ago when I was a a kid. It was was heavy on functions and trig and calculus, so it wasn't exactly a best seller (even with such masterpieces as Jonathon Livingston Seagull topping the chart in the same time period).

The term really hasn't caught on, so maybe I had ought to claim it, popularize it, and call it my own. What the word means is that the general populace has no idea what a a number means; that is if it is significant to the discussion or issue at hand. Quick, now, is the population of the United States :

A. 30 million

B. 300 million

C. 3 billion

D. 30 billion; or

E. None of the above.


We've had about 3,700 soldiers killed in Iraq in the most recent war. Is this more than, less than, or about the same as as the number of soldiers killed in action in Vietnam?

A. Less than.
B. About the same as.
C. More than.

The most people die on an annual basis from which cause?
A. Automobile accidents.
B. Colon/rectal cancer;
C. Lung cancer;
D. Breast cancer.

I doubt you got all three right. The answers are at the bottom. But the real point of the matter is despite how many years of mathemathics and higher education you have, you really had to stop and think about those questions. even if you did get them all right, they didn't roll off your tongue, did they? I started thinking thinking about this last while watching the evening news and listen to them discuss the need for more funding for SIDS (Sudden infant Death Syndrome) because there were 2248 deaths last year, which we can all agree is about 2248 too many. On the other hand, that's two for every 1,000 live births. Cancer, on the other hand, is primarily responsible for about 200 of every 1000 deaths. Think about that for a minute. 6 million deaths every 10 years.

Total federal funding for cancer (All kinds): About $5 billion. Total federal budget for 2003: About $2.2 Trillion. Total spending on cancer as a % of outlays: about 0.5 %, some 35 years after President Nixon declared "War on Cancer."

P.S. The answers above are B, A, and C.

My Birthday

The Rest Of The Night
written by Warren Zevon & Jorge Calderón, Zevon Music, (BMI)/Googolplex Music (BMI)

Why stop now? Let's party the rest of the night!

Seven o'clock, Eight o'clock, Nine o'clock. Ten

You wanna go home? Why? Honey, When?

We may never get this chance again!

Let's party for the rest of the night!

Yeah, Yeah! Oh, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!
Yeah, Yeah! Oh, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!

Why leave now? Let's party for the rest of the night!

Eleven o'clock, Twelve o'clock, One o'clock, Two

Me tired? Well boo-hoo!

I'm starting to fall in love with you

Let's party for the rest of the night!

Yeah, Yeah! Oh, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!
Yeah, Yeah! Oh. Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!

Why slow down? Let's party for the rest of the night!

Three o'clock, Four o'clock, Five o'clock, Six
Let's throw it all into the mix and open up our bag of tricks

And party for the rest of the night!

Oh, Yeah! Yeah, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!
Oh, Yeah! Yeah, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!

We never had an issue! We never had a fight!
Someone must be doing something right!

Yeah, Yeah! Oh, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!
Yeah, Yeah! Oh, Yeah! Let's party for the rest of the night!

Like my friend , Aaron, I decided I was sick about posting about cancer all off the time. 'Sides wides with all the recent excitement, I 've missed some pretty fun posts. With out further adieu (Feckin French) , I give you my 39th birthday (from May 19, 2007).
Josie, welcoming everyone to the party.

Two future members of the Rock and Roll hall of Fame. A sickeningly cute one of my friend Bruce and and my sister, Megan. She just looks guilty, doesn't she??!

Mom and #1 Son.

Cute Couples:

Dancing Fools:

Friends: