"I drink Heartbreak Motor Oil, and Bombay Gin.
I'll sleep when I'm dead.
Straight from the bottle, twisted again.
I'll sleep when I'm dead."
--Warren Zevon, I'll Sleep When I'm Dead
"Shadows are falling and I'm running out breath;
Keep me in your heart for awhile.
If I leave you it doesn't mean I love you any less;
Keep me in your heart for a while.
***
These wheels keep on turning but they're running out of steam;
Keep me in your heart for while.
--Warren Zevon, Keep Me in Your Heart, The Wind, 2004
Another sort of seismic shift this past week . Sleep has gone from bad to absolutely horrible. I'm afraid the end is in sight. 90 minutes here, up for 2 1/2 hours, 75 minutes there, up for another 1 1/2 hours, maybe 2 hours after that. This is with Atavan (a supposed sleeping aid/anti anxiety pill.) Hell, the only thing I'm worried about is not sleeping.
Say what you want about coke, crack, methamphetamine, etc,. As far as I'm concerned, the Devil's own is Decadron. It prevent swelling in the brain, apparently by keeping the blood flowing in the brain full blast 24/7.
On a completely unrelated note, donations are being taken for my children's college fund until Friday this week, for the publication or non publication of photos arising out of a certain party on May 19, 2007. :-)
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4 comments:
hang in there, dogface- these posts are always the hardest to respond to, even though I know everyone's reading them. hard to offer words of hope in the face of impending whatever-the-hell. I love you. Hang in there.
I've been taking the dechadron for a while - you won't sleep on it, but it will make you eat. It also gives me some nasty hiccups and makes my face all blown up.
I'm an expert in cancer-related insomnia. You have to have a variety of tools (ativan, ambien, lunesta, rozerem) and then rotate. You won't sleep like a log every night (remember those days?) but your eyes will remain closed for hours and you probably won't remember that you were half-awake throughout the night.
aaron
Hey Tom--
Where can we send the donations? Is there an account set up?
This so-called college fund sounds more like hush money to me....
Oops...First, let me think about what occurred at your party...
Ok, so to whom should I make the check out to?
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